Finding true love is no easy task. Many people use up their lives searching for it. They do not completely understand love or know how to bring it into their lives. Below, people who are successful in love share their advice on how to find romance and keep love a strong part of your life.
I give with my whole heart. I love with my whole heart. My marrige is not just about me; it takes two. Be supportive, be gentle, and truly listen when there is a problem. I thank God and am truly grateful everyday that I have my husband, my partner. When the chips are down, and I sometimes think, yeah, the grass is greener on the other side, I flip the table and think...I'd rather be misterable and have that person there to work things out with rather than be miserable and alone and not knowing whether I have a shot in love. I have love and it's the most important thing in my life. Touch, is also very important. It's a part of love. Not just sex, but affection in itself is very important. Never leave the house without saying you love one another and always kiss goodbye because you never know what lies in the future.
Candice of North Carolina writes:
Love yourself and others will love you too. Find that man or woman who treats you with respect but is willing to tell you "no, you're wrong, you need to fix that." And be willing to listen to them when they say it. Realize they aren't perfect and neither are you, but marriage is for keeps. Eliminating the "d" word (divorce) means you'll work things out. That may be hard at first, but it keeps getting easier.
And know that they may love you more than you love them, or the other way around. And that's okay. Let them.
Read 1 Corinthians Chapter 13 in the Bible. That is what love is, whether it is your lover or your friend or your worst enemy. Good luck!
Z of New Zealand writes:
I think I just got over not being perfect and made a conscious effort to reduce my levels of generalised anxiety. Probably made me a bit more lovable and self-obesessed than I used to be. :) I think if I'd taken this test about six or so years ago all my scores would have been a lot lower - I used to have panic attacks, insomnia, and was generally pretty discontent through school. Getting help for that sort of stuff really does work.
Leslie of Upstate NY writes:
It's helpful to know that I lost a great love in my early 30's. That puts all things into perspective. When I met my husband, current, I was interested in someone who would be alive. He was and is healthy. Our only real problem was his inability to make a decision and my real interest in not delaying or putting off life. After a real struggle with this opposing thought pattern we admitted that trust was the only thing that would get us on the same path. He would need to trust life to be wonderful and I would need to support him by giving him the time to see that I was not reckless.
I am and always will be the wife who allows my husband the freedom to do what makes him happy - be it golf, which he does three to four times per week, without complaint from me. He is happy and that makes us a couple that is happy. So, let your loved one be free. Don't grouse about the lack of time spent together because he/she is gone. That freedom to express themselves gives you both the opportunity to be true to each other.
When you disagree strongly, give up, give in. Pick your fights with the knowledge that you must be in accord. Agree to disagree, just like you would a trusted friend.
Make the difficult personal habits that your loved one has a private joke that only you will know and keep secret. I tend to giggle when he's not around about the "repeating advice over and over", the way he scratches his head (funny but annoying!), and he will talk and talk and talk about something that has no real bearing on life - Yes, I roll my eyes, make "yada, yada, yada" motions - but not when he will see me and be hurt. He likes to go on and on...so what, he feels and talking helps. I tell no one that I feel this way and I know he has his little moments with my habits, too. No couple is immune or is without moments where you each think, "What is that all about?"
Lastly, I guess I have become sure that "LOVE" (the one with big letters and lots of emotion) is what exists for the young, but love is what we give to ourselves and those we find comforting in our lives. So I love my husband and he loves me.
Megan of California writes:
We take time to remember that we are each other's best friends. We were married for time and eternity and we try to make it work for that reason.
Sometimes I have to think back to why I married my husband, when I am mad at him for not doing the dishes or whatever. But the reason I married him wasn't because he was the best at doing dishes--it was because he is funny, smart, kind and loving.
Try not to let the little things detract from the most important things.
Katy of Canada writes:
It's important to find someone who has lots in common with you. If at the end of the day you can't do things together then you're going to get bored, and most couples who are bored with eachother tend to wander. Also we don't argue. Ever! We discuss our problems without laying blame or recriminating over things that happened last week/month/year. We just like to talk to each other, and that goes a long way towards having a great relationship.
Communication...always talk to, listen and hear what your partner is saying. Touch on a daily basis. Make time for each other. Play and have fun. Dream with each other. Even if you can't afford something you want, dreaming about 'one day' costs nothing. Make each other the center of your worlds. As long as the core stays strong, the things that revolve around it will take care of themselves.
Honesty, communication, not going to bed angry.. well, all of those are important, yet cliche. Probably the most important aspect of a great marriage (or any relationship) is to think long and hard before you settle down. How much do you have in common? Are you able to compromise on your differences? How much can you benefit this person, and how much will they benefit you? A long term relationship is a lot to deal with. Be as sure as you can that you're both ready to take that leap together.
Anonymous of New York, NY writes:
They say communication is the key to good relationships. Whoever "they" are, "they" are right. My wife is my best friend, and we share all of our thoughts, no matter how bizarre or embarrassing; they're not embarrassing because we know our love is unconditional. She is the rock of my world. When we have conflicts, we fight them out, but never forget that we love each other. And yes, I turn to friends to figure my thoughts out as well.